in Television

‘American Horror Story: Hotel’ Season 5 Episode 2 Recap: “Chutes and Ladders”

ahs hotel chutes and ladders

This episode of American Horror Story became more interesting by the minute. SO many things happened, I didn’t think I’d be able to handle it. Not only that, but there were many questions that finally got answered… and even more questions that arose.

At the beginning of the episode we see what really turns Sally on — sowing men into mattresses (a.k.a. a coked out Max Greenfield who is definitely still breathing). But apparently that’s not the only weird place to store bodies in this hotel. The still-alive Swedish vacationer is shown trapped in a neon lair where the creepy little vampire kids are sucking on her blood. Apparently they do this in order to filter the blood for the countess (they’re basically living Brita’s for blood).

Then Lowe is haunted by different nightmares as he continues to stay in room 64; his television turns on by itself, he sees the metal cylinder dildo person, he’s haunted by a more-than-likely ghost couple having sex in his bathroom. I mean, things are getting WEIRD. He also sees his son Holden again, and runs after him (AGAIN) which leads him down the stairs to the lobby where he runs into Sally and Liz Taylor at the bar.

Now we not only get to know more about Sally and her killer (literally) addiction but we also find out that Lowe used to be an alcoholic. There’s a little more talk about addiction, homicides and how twisted and dark both are until finally, we see Will Drake’s fashion show at the Hotel Cortez.

This is where things get good. Tristan (Finn Wittrock) and Claudia (Naomi Campbell) are finally introduced! Although Claudia’s presence is very slim and sort of irrelevant, it’s Tristan’s drugged-out and crazy debut at the show that catches the Countess’s eyes.

But while all of this is going on, Drake’s son Lachlan gives Scarlett Lowe (Lowe’s daughter) a tour of the hotel, in which she sees the vampire children sleeping in coffins and realizes that one of them is her supposedly dead brother.

Back to Tristan, he’s off in the hotel trying to find coke but finds Donovan instead. The two then begin to stumble and fight until the Countess steps in and asks Donovan to let him go. Tristan runs off scared and ends up getting lost in the hotel but follows a melody of jazz toward an empty room. But the room isn’t empty. BAM! Mr. James Peter March (Evan Peters) is introduced.

Having seemingly forgotten that Donovan almost killed him, Tristan goes off trying to find drugs inside March’s room until March gives him a better offer. He then has his laundress bring in a woman tied by ropes, hands Tristan a gun and tells him to shoot her. But even that’s a little far fetched for the junkie. March precedes to shoot the woman himself and sends Tristan running coincidentally toward the Countess where they then begin their love affair (which leads to Donovan being thrown out of the hotel).

Then we cut back to Scarlett and her vampy brother. She escapes her parents house to find him, which leads them to create a police search for her and when she comes back to tell them that their son is actually alive, she gets yelled at for it! How sad is that?

Okay lets get back to Tristan and the Countess because this is where questions get answered. As they finish consummating their love, the Countess explains that she has given him a virus, which makes him IMMORTAL! She then goes on to explain how she was born in 1904 and was given the virus sometime in her twenties. We also see a couple of groovy flashbacks from the seventies which reassure us that the Countess and Gaga are QUEEN.

Finally, towards the end of the episode we get a little more clearance as to who James March is. As Lowe tries to arrest Iris, she decides to give him a history lesson about the Hotel.

She goes on to explain how March was an oil tycoon from the East who migrated West to create an Art Deco building that could satisfy his peculiar appetite. He was basically building a perfectly designed torture chamber. It’s rumored that he had a wife who he made watch all the tortures (but I don’t think that’s true and I have a huge feeling that the Countess could be his Ex-Misses). We then see a bunch of gory violence á la Ryan Murphy and finally get to know that March actually killed himself and his Laundress when the police come looking for him.

The episode ends with Lowe realizing that their is a connection between March, the new anonymous murderer and the Ten Commandments. Hopefully next episode we’ll get a little more insight into what these sins will reveal.